2nd Meeting - Anne Rice Philippines - March 25, 2006

And just when some thought it would not happen again, lo and behold, we
had our second meeting last Saturday at Powerbooks Megamall.
Admittedly, its been a long time coming, but as the old adage says, better late
than never.

First
off, I would like to thank those who went. I know how important most of
our Saturday nights are to each and every one of us, but you still came
and I’m so glad and thankful that you all were there. Those who were in
attendance were Pinky, my Rowan Mayfair for life; Boots, who missed out
the last time but whose enthusiasm for what we do is infectious as
always; Lynn, our Talamascan representative who
came in black and whose accessories stole the rest of the evening
(ehem!); Ruby Mae, who had to come after her curiosity was aroused
after much persuasion. She is also my colleague from “Echoes of the Heart”, the radio talk show I do every Saturday afternoon with our one and only Ms. World, Ms. Evangeline Pascual;
Eman, Boots’ friend and manager of Kenny Rogers Megamall; and a new
recruit named Letty, who along with her 11 year old son, Lester simply
sat in our area and didn’t think that a discussion was going on prior
to when we started.

Sadly
those who were not in attendance were missed namely Toby, Powerbooks
Megamall Book Club leader and facilitator, Babette and Marie, both dear
friends and fellow Powerbooks Book Club members. 3 members of
CharmedPinoy, Penny, Deks and Jo were also missed as they had their own
meeting to be at as well. Jonatz, a fellow Terry Brooks fan and finally
Beng, the sister of Boots responsible for our logo and hard at work
with our website too.

And
so we started as everyone was coming in and kicked off with the usual
introductions and updates. Ruby Mae, starting it by revealing that she
had to come and see for herself what transpires in Book Club
discussions like these. No doubt that after tonight, she would be
attending more and has become Anne-curious. Boots who was also a former
colleague from DWIZ, came with Eman and was so happy to be finally
attending.

She added that although her sister Beng, was absent from our gathering, she is nonetheless hard at work at our groups website. I just can’t wait.
In fact, she is also responsible for our “logo”. Before moving on to
Pinky who sat beside me, the turn fell to our new “recruit”, Letty.

She
was merely seated at our area to have a little reading time of her own
when our Vampire books laid for everyone to see on the low-rise center
table caught her attention; not to mention that we, beautiful Children
of the Millenia simply could not be anything but noticeable. Pardon my
indulgencies. If we don’t do that, then who better than ourselves lest
we wait for the promise of a compliment from others who cannot give it.
Ha, ha. Lestat speaking. Ah, Le Attention. Oui.

Little
did she know that she would be in for a treat and this automatically
warrants her invitation and eventual inclusion into our coven; the
mother of 1 and an entrepreneur at that. This just reminds me of the
other parent who initially joined us the last time we met. I would be
hard pressed not to think that meeting other people who just happen to
discover us is merely an accident. And at the risk of waxing a little bit of fatalism here, nothing is of course is an accident.
And after Pinky introduced herself as well, who happens to be a former
colleague of mine from the now defunct, SVI, we were well on our way.

To
say that what they discovered about the Lestat in this second helping
of the Chronicle as being different and not the abrasive, impetuous
vamp everyone got a taste of in Interview is an understatement.
Lestat in his own tell-all book, redeems himself to a point and sheds a
little more light into his own life before becoming a vampire as well
as a take on the mythology of vampires in Anne’s universe.

You see, Lestat was the son of a marquis in the French province of Auvergne.
His title doesn’t exclude him from certain accordance of respectability
and affluence but he certainly doesn’t feel that way. Reclusive and
always searching for the meaning of his own life, he displayed a
restlessness that was unchanneled and shelved. From his father’s
blatant disregard and prohibition of a proper education, to his
mother’s indifference and ironic display of voracious reading, Lestat
only had his dreams and the quest to find meaning in his dismal
existence to contend with.

This clearly marks the foundation of a certain degree of bitterness that we see in Interview.
His quest to find meaning finds him single handedly going out into the
woods and killing a pack of wolves that have been terrorizing the
village. His brave act earned him the nick, Wolfkiller and the
attention of Magnus, the degenerate Vampire who turned him and Nicholas
de Lenfrent; another marquis son and who would later be his lover and
friend and at the same time an antithesis to Lestat’s own positive
quest.

Lestat’s
quest has extracted consequences as he had to make decision after
decision. From both turning his mother and best friend Nicholas into
vampires after escaping to Paris to become an actor and be turned into
a vampire by Magnus; to meeting Armand, the auburn-haired vampire who
lives below the Paris catacombs, Les Innocents; to abandoning them both
in search of new mentor, an older Vampire named Marius who both sired
Armand and keeper of the 1^st vampires, the Mother and
Father. The book has successfully reworked the vampire mythos and its
subsequent stereotypes and simultaneously give us an origin that is
both supernatural and scientific; not to mention, original.

Most
of us in the group also agreed that Gabrielle, Lestat’s mother was not
a sympathetic character, as she would in her own way tease Lestat with
her books and yet lift not a finger to openly challenge his Father’s
ban for him to get a proper education. Ironically in the book she would
be seen reading to herself in her room or if not, foster his "street
smart” capabilities, and urging her own indulgencies through him or in
support of his very own.

What mother would deny her
own child the one thing that would make him happy and give resonance of
a meaning in his life? What parent would do that? Of course, this
brought rise to the prohibitions that our own parents imposed on us as
we were growing up; from urging us to take a different course at
school, to the restriction of certain types of people to be with and
befriend as well as to the imposing of certain living conditions as we
stay with them under the same roof.

Anne’s
take on Gabrielle was certainly a far cry from her own mother who
actually allowed her to have her own way as she grew up; from changing
her name to Anne from a previous masculine name of Howard, to just
writing and scribbling words and phrases on the wall with the use of
crayons as she ran around the house with her other siblings. Clearly,
Gabrielle would not have tolerated that.

But
more than tolerate his own mother did Lestat do. Rescuing her from
certain death as she was suffering from consumption, a fatal disease,
he turned her into an Immortal to be his longtime companion, after he
himself was made into one. She was ideally the perfect mate for him;
however she became mad and went on to travel the world, mingling with
tribes and living in the forests, and learning from nature what it can
about beauty and peace, in search of her own aesthetics.

Lestat’s
action of turning her mother can certainly be viewed as selfish in the
modern world and with our current and ever changing sense of norm and
values would still frown upon an affront display of self preservation
and blinded love and affection.

And because Lestat
was not given a choice by Magnus, his absentee maker when he turned him
into a vampire, our hero makes it a point to give his victims a choice
that he was never given; to either be an immortal or simply be fodder
for their folly, in short a victim to their never ending hunger.

And
certainly ‘twas the hunger for company, knowledge, and good
conversation that has brought this group together as we feasted on ensaymada and empanada
as our discussion, albeit short, flourished and detoured from issues of
Machiavellian and Nihilistic concepts that Anne has woven into her
works to outrage over the movie version of the Chronicles.

We
knew then as we know now that we are all still in for a further treat
as we plan for our next gathering next month where, the 3^rd book of the chronicle, Queen of the Damned will be the book in focus.

Till
then my fellow Immortals. Let’s keep the fire burning and alive by
properly taking stock of our own light. And may it shine for ourselves
to remind us who we are and who we can be but also a beacon for others
to take the same lead and affect others as positively as we know how;
the very same way how Anne was able to do that and more.

Brokeback Mountain

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Drama

What is A Life not Lived, but a Life not Loved...

As subtle as it is, this is the basic lesson that one can gleam from after watching the movie adaptation of the Anne Proulx novel. But unlike some lessons in life and in regular movie watching, the film doesn’t openly tackle this on and the director has given us a perfect exercise in patience and nuance all in one serving; one that spans more than an hour and half’s worth of viewing.

Coming out of the theatre, I didn’t think much of the haunting quality that the film has and high praises for the movie as the sole basis. I knew that I wanted to see it from the first day I heard about it from a friend and immediately wondered if such a film would ever see the light of day here so that local moviegoers would be to treat themselves to a beautiful, lyrical and metaphorical piece of art.

Could one call it providential if not coincidental that Ang Lee, who directed an earlier gay-themed hit, Wedding Banquet be tasked with the job of being at the helm of a similar and yet even more profound of a film? Perhaps there is a higher hand at play here, equally choosing him for the task and for the people who wanted to have the film made with him initially in mind.

What makes the film work on a subconscious level is its inimitable play for symbolism and cryptic references to archetypes; those that society has lulled us into playing and drummed enough fear of impending consequence into us should we stray from it.

Oscar nominee Health Ledger plays Ennis del Mar; a down on his luck cowboy living in Wyoming in 1963. With an impending engagement and the need for stability he goes to look for a honest job that would tide him over during the summer season. His train brings him to a job offering that requires him to tend sheep for the summer months.

He and Jack Twist, the character played by Jake Gyllenhaal are the only contenders for the job and so have taken upon themselves to the task. However, it would be a division of labor as one would set up camp and other to tend the flock. Along with this, the job also required that neither of the two hands should be at the same spot. The sheepherder comes to camp only on meal times and goes back to the flock in the field afterwards. He is not to stay in camp lest wolves and poachers get to the sheep without their knowledge as it has happened in the past.

The movie plays on in different sequences as the two men learned to deal with the hazards of the job; from meeting up with bears and losing your food ration in the process, or to the mundane situation of having to eat the same rationed food every mealtime. The only thing that took them away and made them forget the routine of their jobs is the series of talks that they have together. And with one talk leading to another and an eventual binging of booze and food, the two become drunk and in that fateful early morning discover what they are capable of being for each other.

I for one delighted at the mixed reaction that the crowd gave out; from peals of delight and giggles to horrendous gasps for air out of awe and disgust at having to men go express their love for each other more physically than most, it was the very least that this movie has done for the movie going public. Because after watching the film, one could just simply regard the film as the “quintessential gay cowboy” film that got robbed the Oscar. If that’s the case then that would be merely scratching the surface for the film goes much deeper than that so much so that the Oscar winning score, by way of the intermittent guitar plucking with the vast expanse of the Wyoming horizon looming in the background adds to its already brooding and haunting quality.

The film basically centers on two of the archetypes that we can easily relate to. The archetypes of the Dreamer and the Doer. And that’s what some moviegoers fail to see as all they see are the visages of two men groping each other and coming to terms with their feelings for one another.

Tom Ford, the designer of Gucci, once said that for him human sexuality is fluid, it could go either way. Ennis, Heath’s character, with his garbled way of speaking and expressing himself is the person in the film who could not come to terms with his blossoming sexuality.
Ennis, was traumatized as a kid when his father brought him to see a dead man lying in a ravine with his genitals all bloodied after being tied to a cart and pulled like an animal. This incident was so embedded in his subconscious that he felt that he would suffer the same kind of condemnation should he acknowledge what was growing inside of him; the realization that one man can be attracted to another.

He reflects the very same conflict that most unprepared gay men feel when they come face to face with this realization at a crucial time in their lives and without proper guidance would instead revert back into their closet and be more closed, withdrawn and miserable than when they first came out. However if done right and with the proper set of friends and supportive people in their lives, they would come out of it feeling better and happier about themselves and learn to accept their true nature in the process.

That facet in the film’s characterization of Ennis was something that I chanced upon after pondering about it afterwards. I got so distracted and strained my ears to a point in trying to understand each and every word that Ennis was trying to say. Understand that in the film Ennis is a southerner and being played by an Australian actor trying to mimic the accent doesn’t help at all. And I guess the reason the director, Ang Lee, adopted that ploy was to further heighten that part of Ennis that he could not handle. That how could a butch, masculine cowboy like him ever see himself being physically intimate with another man. How could he even dream of living his life with another man?

It runs contrary to his and society’s perception and required pattern of a behavioral norm. Deep down inside him he dreams of that; of one day waking up to society where he is not condemned for what he yearns for and hopes; and so he ends up being who he is all through his life; paralyzed by his own fear and a victim of his inability to act. A Dreamer.

Jack Twist, played by Jake Glynenhall, on the other hand, the more liberal and emotionally progressive of the two, exemplifies the Doer in us all. He, in his own way is also a dreamer but takes it one notch higher as he dares to do something about it and makes it manifest for himself.

He is not afraid at instigating the relationship and to push the boundaries under which it operates but among the two is able to at least voice it out and lays it out in the open as he confesses the dream that he has for the both of them; that is to share and have a life together. Between the two he is also the first to acknowledge his feelings for Ennis and validates it by saying it out in the open; something that Ennis cannot do and struggles with all throughout in the film

Jack is altogether comfortable in his own skin as he sought out other pleasures from other men, because Ennis could not be there for him all the time, and it was impossible geographically for he was in Texas and Ennis was rooted in Wyoming.

Jack comes to defend his behavior when Ennis in a spurt of jealousy physically threatens him if there is another man in his life by saying how dare Ennis condemns him for something he goes into for the one thing that he yearns for is something that Ennis could not give no matter how much they try.

As a direct contrast to Ennis’ negation, borne out of fear, Jack could always be counted on to revert back to the one thing that gave him strength; the vision that he would hold true and keep till the end of the film. That if they were both willing, he and Ennis could have the life that they wanted. Here the facet of the dreamer ends and the doer enters as he acknowledges it and maps out the possible steps to take in order to see that dream come to fruition.

Having done that, then the occasional “fishing trips” that they take in Brokeback mountain, would more be of a reality than just a dream. That they would take control and let their reality be what they want and will it to be rather than be slaves to the dictates of society and be pegged into positions that it has selected and deemed appropriate for them.

Never in the film was what they had ever made to be against religion but more against of the accepted norm that which the milieu of their society at that time expects and dictates as Ennis negates the very suggestion of happiness that Jack brings up time to time; a suggestion that not only is a way out of the circumstances that they feel powerless to change; but rather a way in for another path and possibility to take.

And seeing what Ennis does in the film, I cannot help but be reminded of how many of us out there have actually tread the same road that he was on; that we constantly deny our own road to happiness just because it is in conflict with that other people expect from us; from our parents; friends; colleagues and even tradition.

And in relation to that, who among us have been the Jack in our lives and constantly follow up the things that we hope to have and achieve for ourselves? Have we been honest in what we feel about the circumstances in our lives or merely acknowledge that we are powerless to change it while at the same whine and complain about not wanting them in the first place and yearn for a better one at the same time?

With the theme that underlines their respective circumstances, the two main characters in the film could have been easily substituted with either a Christian and a Moslem and how they long to be together amidst the backdrop of the constraints of their respective religion; or if not a married man torn between his obligation to his wife and his growing devotion to another woman or vice versa. Because if all we see about Brokeback mountain is the story of two gay men; one repressed and one who expresses himself; then the movie has failed to convey to us that which it serves to remind.

That it is in our hands as to which archetype we belong to, the Doer or the Dreamer.

If we see that and openly acknowledge as to which among the two we belong, then at least recognition of where we are in our lives would serve as the catalyst to invoke changes where we want them and when we want them to happen.

By doing so, we would have at least succeeded in being in step and closer to the goal that we want in our lives and in turn, reach and live the Brokeback mountain in our lives, amidst the real world of shattered dreams, unrequited love, failed relationships and promised successes instead of just dreaming and living it in our imagination and in the world of wishful thinking.

All of these come into play regardless of the amount of effort we put into the many events that populate our myriad lives. It all falls under the cosmic rule of cause and effect. Do you want success in your life and yet not seek out the job that you want? Do you want love or at the very least a relationship to come into your life and yet you stay at home and don’t go out meeting people for dates?

How much do you want it? Ask yourself. Because if you want something so bad to effect in your lives? Then you must do the first step, cause it first.

Because like the painful and bittersweet lesson that Ennis learns at the end of the film. A Live not Lived is a Life not Loved.